Lunch Box of Twinkies
Posted on Sat Sep 6th, 2025 @ 3:44am by Lieutenant Commander Zuub & Lieutenant Amy Gordon
1,240 words; about a 6 minute read
Mission:
On the Trail
Location: Sickbay
Timeline: Sometime after Call for Help
Amy drew in a breath or two, girding up her courage. She felt she needed to go talk with the CMO, Zuub. She wasn't certain that she truly wanted to do so, but with the ship being the size it was, better to make certain that there wasn't going to be too much clashing. There were new people coming onboard the Valiant, making a larger team to accomplish certain goals. She took a drink of water, Amy then tapped on her commbadge.
"Commander Zuub, may I have a moment of your time? This is Lieutenant Gordon."
=^= Of course, =^= Zuub answered, her antennae swaying unsteadily, as she wondered why she was paged. =^= Where would you like to meet? =^=
"How about Medical, unless you prefer somewhere else, but I would also like to see if all of the supplies had arrived." Amy hadn't been in medical since she had cleaned the place. And wanted to see how Zuub had it set up.
=^= The supplies? =^= Zuub asked, her antennae warbling unsteadily. Tyree had told Zuub that she would not have a lot of room and everything that was going to be put on this ship was not to have any Starfleet markings. She believed that she had everything, but perhaps Gordon knew something else. =^= Medical is fine. I am here. =^=
Amy walked into medical carrying the yellow school bus lunch box. Tt clanked a little bit as she stepped into medical. "Hello Doctor Zuub, I've got something here to examine and am wondering if the legend of Twinkies being able to last centuries is true or not. I have inside twinkies that I found in a hidden alcove. Are they actually still good to eat?" She paused and on a more serious note. "Also, I would like to apologize for my unseemly demeanor where your innuendo comment was about. I was caught quite off guard."
Zuub blinked, as she looked at the Twinkie. This was a food? Terrans were certainly unusual in their tastes and prudish in their behaviors. The contradictions never ceased to amaze her. She gloved a hand and picked up the Twinkie, wondering if this being edible was some sort of innuendo. Her head turned to one side as she inspected it and her antennae wavered unsteadily. "Apology accepted," she responded simply in her wispy voice. "Are you certain that these things are meant to be eaten?"
She brought it closer to her antennae to see if she could sense anything more about it. Almost immediately, her antennae stood straight up. She put it back down and ran a medical tricorder over it, asking, "Is there anything natural about this thing? I have been accused of being perverse, but ingesting this seems like an unwise thing to do, even were this fresh."
"The spongecake maybe, but in truth I am not one to taste it. It used to be a pastry with real whipped cream but then, the ingredients changed, from what history had said. No longer a delightful snack cake but something less so." Amy shuddered. "I am wondering how old those are. Not going to eat them though."
"I could carbon date it, if you desire."
"If you would please, I am curious and do wish to know." Amy responded. "Also I want to know if you found Medical, the cleanliness of it to your satisfaction, I ended up working on it when we first came on to the Adelaide."
Zuub took the Twinkie to a flat surface and put a forcefield around it. Bombarding it with radiocarbon. Her antennae started to twitch quickly. "Who would do this?" she muttered.
"Oh the Twinkies? I haven't a clue. But they say that roaches, alligators, and Twinkies would survive a holocaust. It's an old earth saying. Though some say that Twinkies caused a holocaust." Amy watching Zuub run her experiment.
"I doubt that," Zuub answered, her antenna becoming slightly more stiff. "These Twinkies, as you call them, are only five to six years old. So, barring cryofreeze, someone decided to re-manufacture them. Distasteful."
Amy shuddered,"Horrible thought about what someone did. I will keep the lunchbox but the Twinkies, they need to be destroyed. What do you think about making certain these do not get back out there into the universe and save it from a making an anomaly?"
Zuub nodded her head several times in a rare show of human-like emotions. "I will gladly destroy these disgusting objects that pose as food, though I wonder...." Her antennae slowly started to wriggle.
"Uh-" Amy slightly hesitant began "What are you wondering about?" Who knows what Zuub was going to say.
"Certainly it should be obvious," Zuub answered. "These may have no nutritious value whatsoever, but with their now harder outer core, it could be an interesting experience to utilize it as a toy. After all, the creamy center could add a bit of fun...." Her antennae writhed slightly and started to get more active doing so. "The sensations could be exquisite."
The directions that Zuub's mind could go, Amy wondered if the Andorian woman was part Risan or Deltan. She'd not come across an Andorian before who tended to veer in such a direction before.
"I will leave those for you to examine them further." Amy raised an eyebrow, then gave out a huff. "I still want to destroy them."
"Why did you bring them to me if you intended to destroy them?" Zuub asked, her antennae starting to whirl unsteadily.
"I wanted to see just how old they were and to find out what you thought of them. I hadn't thought of destroying them until we got to talking about the theory of them causing an anomaly. And maybe we don't have to get rid of all of them. Just how long would it take for the destruction of one?" Amy raising an eyebrow.
"That would depend on your chosen method of destruction."
"I don't know maybe take a hammer to it and see how flat I can smash it, then maybe send it into the recycler. This way it can be made into something useful." Amy giving a shrug.
"The recycler is most logical. Smashing with a hammer would be loud and messy. I cannot permit that in a place that is meant to be hygienic."
"I wouldn't be smashing it in here, especially since I cleaned this place from top to bottom before you arrived. It was a mess." Amy replied, looking around the place.
"Well, I appreciate that you did a thorough cleaning. So, where will you smash it, if that is what you intend to do?"
"I intend on smashing it in the cargohold." she paused doing some quick thinking, then shook her head. "Nope, quick change of mind. I scrubbed that clean as well so not going to mess it at all. " Amy gave out a laugh.
She gave a shrug. "I will leave them to you to do what you'd like to do with them. I'll take this with me." She held up the school bus lunchbox.
The Andorian's antennae whirled unsteadily, not understanding the significance. "As you wish." She picked up the twinkie again and her antennae started to slowly change their whirling to a light twitter.
With a wave, Amy left medical clutching the yellow school bus lunch box to her as a prized possession.
Lieutenant Amy Gordon
Chief Intelligence
SS. Adelaide
Lieutenant Commander Zuub
Chief Medical Officer
SS Adelaide
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